Akatsuki Songs
by elric0sis
Summary: A bunch of random, funny songs that i altered to make the akatsuki in them! Some yaoi! KakuHida, KisaIta, PeiKo, SasoDei, ZetTobi P.S.: I added my "FUN kisaita" story into this collection as well!
1. It Sucks To Be Me!

AU: ok, i guess i'm just now doing a drabble collection of songs that i took the lyrics to and altered with the akatsuki in them! So now, if you have a funny song that you want to see here with the Akatsuki as the stars, tell me and i will write it!  
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR ANY OF THE SONGS IN MY STORIES!

(It Suck's To Be Me-Avenue Q)

Konan: Morning Pein!

Pein: Hi Konan-koi

Konan: How's life?

Pein: Crappy

Konan: What's wrong now?

Pein: The guys still won't listen to me.

Konan: Aw, it's okay.

Pein: No it's not! I mean, look at me! I'm the god of the Rain Village and I always thought-

Konan: Yes?

Pein: No, it sounds unreasonable.

Konan: Come on! yuo can tell me!

Pein: Well, when we were homeless, I thought I would be-

Konan: What?

Pein: the center of the earth, it revolves around me!

Konan: (laughs)

Pein: But now I'm "Leader-sama" and as you can see-, I'm not!

Konan: Nope!

Pein: Oh, well!

Konan: Oh well,

Pein: It sucks to be me!

Konan: No...

Pein: It sucks to be me!

Konan: No.....

Pein: It sucks to be dejected and second best, it not being about me! It sucks to be me!

Konan: You think your life sucks!

Pein: Yup, pretty much!

Konan: You're problems aren't so bad!

Konan: I'm really pretty, and pretty damn smart!

Pein: Yup!

Konan: I'm surrounded by men wherever I walk!

Pein: Wait, what?!

Konan: So why~ don't I have a caring boyfriend! (BEEP!) It sucks to be me!

Pein: I thought I was your boyfriend! T:,:T

Konan: It sucks to be me!

Pein: It sucks to be Pein-

Konan: and Konan

Pein: To not have power-

Konan:To not have a decent date!

Both: It sucks to be me!

(Arguing in the backround)

Pein: Hey! Kakuzu, Hidan, can you solve something for us?

Kakuzu: Um, sure sunny

Konan: Who's life sucks more, Brian's or mine?

Both: OURS!

Kakuzu: We are partners-

Hidan: We are as (BEEPING) close as they get.

Kakuzu: We have been at eachother's throats-

Hidan: ever since the day we met!

Kakuzu: So he knows every way to make me completly UPSET!

Hidan: (BEEP) WHAT?!

Kakuzu: Oh, everyday is an aggrivation-

Hidan: Oh come on that's a (BEEPING) exaggeration!

Kakuzu: You leave your sacrifices out, you leave blood on the chairs.

Hidan: Oh yeah? You do (BEEPING) asshole thing likes stitching your (BEEPING) underwear!

Kakuzu: You make this very small base that we share~ a HELL!

Hidan: So do (BEEPING) you! That's why I'm, in (BEEPING) hell too!

Kakuzu: It sucks to be me!

Hidan: It sucks to be me!

Konan: It sucks to be me!

Pein: It sucks to be me!

All: Is there anybody here that it doesn't suck to be?! It sucks to be me!

(Sing up a scale twice)

Itachi: Why are you idiots so happy?

Hidan: Because our (BEEPING) lives suck!

Itachi: You think YOUR lives suck? Am I hearing correctly? Hn.

Itachi: I join Akatsuki, for opportunities!

Itachi: Tried to work in a Chinese industry, but I speak Japanese!

Itachi: But with the Sharingan I killed my whole family~ and my best friend!

Itachi: My brother wants to kill me!

Itachi: But he's still too weak!

Itachi: And I have a shark for a boyfriend!

Itachi: And we get lots of missions to go do!

Itachi: It sucks to be me! It sucks to be me!

Itachi: I say it Sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucka-sucks! It sucks to be me!

Tobi: Hi there guys!

Hidan: (BEEPING) shit...

Tobi: Tobi is looking for his senpai's scope!

Itachi: (sigh) why did you lose it this time?

Tobi: Well, Tobi looked all over the base, but Tobi couldn't find it anywhere. But Tobi thinks its here-Hey looka butterfly! (chases)

Pein: That boy's an idiot...

Tobi: Thank you leader-sama!

Pein: Hey! Kisame!

Kisame: I'm coming! I'm coming!

Tobi: Oh my god! It's a shark-man!

Itachi: Hey! :(

Kisame: Yup! I'm a shrk-man, not from under the sea! I got a boyfriend, who is hot indeed!

Itachi: ^///////.\\\\\\\\^

Kisame: But now I'm ugly, and the butt of everyone's jokes! But I"m here -the brute force- of Akatsuki!

All: It sucks to be you!

Konan: You win!

All: It sucks to be you!

Pein: I feel better now!

Kisame: Try having people stop you and ask, "what the HELL are you?!". It get's old.

All: It sucks to be you!

In Akatsuki!

In Akatsuki!

In Akatsuki!

But now that we're together

we're together!

At Akatsuki!

We work in Akatsuki!

Some enemies do too!

'Til we get our lives straight,

We are in Akatsuki!

Tobi: That's for sure!

All: We work in Akatsuki!

Hidan: Go kick him (BEEPING) out now!

All: We work in Akatsuki!

Kisame: Bye Tobi! (kicks out door)

All: Welcome to Akatsuki!

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AU: so you like??? please tell me what song to do next!!!!!!! 


	2. FUN

AU: LOL, ok, this is based off of a video on youtube and it's the song "F.U.N" with Spongbob and Plankton, but with akatsuki!  
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR SPONGEBOB ________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Kisame: Killing's not about winning, it's about fun!

Itachi: Fun? What's that.

Kisame: Fun is when you.....fun is...it's like....

Itachi: -/.\-?

Kisame: It's kinda.....sorta like a...Hm, what is fun?...Let me spell it for you!

Itachi: What?

Kisame: F is for freaks who kill stuff together!

Itachi: Freaks? o/.\o

Kisame: U is that's you and me!

Itachi: Us?

Kisame: N is for anywhere on any mission at all!

Akatsuki: At here in the Akatsuki!

Itachi: No. F is for fire that kills my whole clan!

Kisame: =0.0=

Itachi: U is for uranium that kills all!

Kisame: =O.O=

Itachi: N is for no survivors, except Sasuke-

Kisame: Itachi! That's not fun is about! It's like this, F is for freaks who do stuff-

Itachi:No! That is completly idiotic!

Kisame: Here, let me help you...(picks up Itachi)

Itachi: O/.\O Put me down!!!

Kisame: (moves him around) F is for freaks who do stuff together

Itachi: No! Now! (pissed off weasel)

Kisame: U is that's you and me! (swings around)

Itachi:(sigh) N is for anywhere on any mission at all!

Akatsuki: At here in the Akatsuki!

Kisame: (puts down)

Itachi: Wait, what's with all of this? I feel all, happy inside. Let's stop now.

Kisame: No! That's what you're suppose to feel like!

Itachi: grr....it's not really enjoyable...

Kisame: Again!

Both: F is for frolic through all of the gore!

Both: U is for ukelele!

Itachi: what ever that might be....

Both: N is for hot ramen, dango, and pocky!

Both: Here with my killing buddy!

(Killing random people and evil laughing)

Akatsuki: At here in the Akatsuki!

________(Later)________

Itachi: Ugh.......Kisame, why did you get us drunk again?

Kisame: Because Itachi! You're fun when you're drunk! =^.^=

Itachi: ......i hate you......

Kisame: love ya two! XD

Itachi: (activated Sharingan)

Kisame: ....oh.......shit......(runs)

AU: hope you liked it! just a proven fact of my insanity mixed with pocky, arigato! 


	3. If You Were Gay!

AU: This is another song-fic, something...^/.\^' I really don't know what this called! Anyways, hope you enjoy this one!  
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR THIS SONG!!!!!

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
(If You Were Gay-Avenue Q- 2:54 )

Deidara: Finally! An afternoon in the base with my favorite manual,un! "Blowing Up Random Crap 101, un"! No Tobi to bother me,un! How can I get it any better than this,un!

Tobi: (bursts in room) Hi Sempai!

Deidara: Hey Tobi, un.

Tobi: Hey Sempai! You'll never guess what happened to Tobi by the garden today! This plant-thing was smiling at Tobi, and talking to Tobi-

Deidara: Tobi, who cares, un-

Tobi: It was being really friendly to Tobi, and Tobi thinks, that it thought Tobi was GAY!

Deidara: Hm, well, un, why are you telling me this, un? Why would I care, un? I hate you, un. So, what did you do stupid after that, un?

Tobi: Well, Sempai doesn't have to get all ruffled up about it...

Deidara: I'M NOT GETTIN RUFFLED UP, UN!

Deidara: Un, why do I care about some gay thing you met, un? I am trying to learn!

Tobi: Tobi didn't mean to make Sempai mad, since the whole Akatsuki is gay...

Deidara: WHAT?! No, un! No! I don't care, un! Go away!

Tobi: But Sempai!

Deidara: GO!

Tobi: Well, ok....But just so you know,

Tobi: If Semapi was gay too! That'd be just you!

Tobi: Tobi mean, hey! Tobi would like you anyway!

Tobi: 'Cause you see, if it was Tobiiiiii!

Tobi: Tobi would say he was gay! But Tobi doesn't know!

Deidara: Tobi, before I blow you sky high, un, Go Away.

Tobi: (stares)

Deidara: What, un?!?!

Tobi: If Sempai was queer!

Deidara: Grr, Tobi.

Tobi: Tobi would still be here!

Deidara: Tobi, go bother Itachi or someone...

Tobi: Year after year!

Deidara: Tobi!

Tobi: Because you're my Sempai!

Deidara: Un!

Tobi: And Tobi know that you!

Deidara: Un?

Tobi: Would love Tobi too!

Deidara: UN?!?! O.\/

Tobi: If Tobi said today, 'Hey Sempai, Tobi is Gay!' But Tobi doesn't know!

Tobi: Tobi's happy, just being in Akatsuki!

Deidara: Kami hates us, leader too!

Tobi: So what should it matter to Tobi, WHAT YOU DO IN BED WITH SASORI?

Deidara: Tobi, un! What the Hell! O/////.\/

Tobi: Nuh-uh!

Tobi: If Sempai was gay!!

Deidara: Un....

Tobi: Tobi would shout, HOORAY!

Deidara: I'm not going to listen!

Tobi: And here Tobi would stay!

Deidara: UN, UN, UN, UN!

Tobi: But Tobi would stay out of your way!

Deidara: AH!!!!!!

Tobi: You can count on Tobi! To always be!!!!! Next to you everyday, to tell you it's ok! Sempai was just born that way!

Tobi: And as they say, IT'S IN OUR D.N.A! Sempai's Gay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Deidara: I AM NOT, UN!

Tobi: But if Sempai was gay!

Deidara: UN!!!

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AU: Hope you guys enjoyed it!


	4. Barbie Girl!

AU: Thanks to everyone who has either left a review or took time to read my stories! Now, based off of a request song, here's the next song!  
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR THIS SONG!!!!!  
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Barbie Girl (3:14) -Aqua

Tobi: Hi Guys!  
Ukes: Hi Tobi.  
Tobi: Do you guys want to sing?  
Ukes: No!!!!! (un)  
Tobi: OK!!!!

Tobi: I am Zetsu's uke, in Akatsuki! (come on guys)  
Konan: (sigh) Life in here, it's crazier!  
Dediara: You can brush my (beautiful) hair, un.  
Itachi: Undress me everywhere.  
(at this point, all of the Semes rushed into the room)  
Hidan: Jashin will smite you, Tobi, I really hate you.......

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties! (ukes: O///////.\\\\\\\O)

Tobi: We are all ukes, in Akatsuki!  
Konan: Living life here, we have no fear! (Pein gulped)  
Deidara: You can brush my hair, un (Sasori: Psh, yeah right)  
Itachi: Undress me everywhere.......(Kisame: *whistles)  
Hidan: May Jashin smite you, Tobi, I really hate you.........

Deidara: I'm a blonde bomber dude, always in a bad mood.  
Konan: Dress me up, do it right, I'm yours only!  
Pein: You're my doll, rock n' roll  
Kisame: See the cuteness in black!  
Sasori: Kiss me here,  
Zetsu: touch me there,  
Kakuzu: money, honey!

Itachi: You can touch,  
Tobi: You can play,  
Itachi: If you say,  
Both: "I'm always yours!"

Dediara: Un, Un, Un!

Tobi: We all are ukes, in Akatsuki!  
Konan: Life as paper, it's greater!  
Deidara: You can brush my hair, un  
Itachi: Undress me everywhere.  
Hidan: Jashin, please kill me or, kill those four!

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties! (ukes: O////.\\\\O)

Hidan: (BEEP) (BEEP) (BEEP) NO!

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties!

Dediara: No! noooo! No! noooo!

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties!

Konan: Ah, Ah, Ah, NO!

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties!

Itachi: No, noooo, no, noooo

Tobi: Make me walk, make me talk!  
Hidan: Only if you're a wussy,  
Konan: I'll be your little star,  
Deidara: Or we'll kick you between the knees!

Sasori: Now don't be rash, little brat  
Kisame: Let's just try to stay calm!  
Pein: Kill a village,  
Kakuzu: play around,  
Zetsu: Or go party!

Itachi: You can touch,  
Tobi: You can play!  
Itachi: If you say,  
Both: "I'm always yours!"

Itachi: You can touch,  
Tobi: You can play!  
Itachi If you say,  
Both: "I'm always yours!"

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties!

Hidan: (BEEP) (BEEP) (BEEP) NO!

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties!

Dediara: No, nooo! No, nooo!

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties!

Konan: Ah, Ah, Ah, NO!

Semes: Come on ukes! Shake those booties!

Itachi: No, noooo, no, noooo

Tobi: We are all ukes, in Akatsuki!  
Konan: Even thought it sucks here, we still stay here!  
Deidara: You can brush my hair, un!  
Itachi: Undress me everywhere.  
Hidan: Jashin will kill you, Jashin really hates you!

Tobi: We are all ukes, in Akatsuki!  
Konan: Life as paper, it is greater!  
Dediara: You can go die, ouh! (Sasori: That's different)  
Itachi: Or killed by Amaterasu! (Kisame: =O.O=)  
Hidan: Now you're talking, let's go smite thee!

Semes: Come on guys! We don't deserve to die!

Deidara: Yes you do, un!

Semes: Come on guys! We don't deserve to die!

Hidan: Too late, too late!

Semes: Come on guys! We don't deserve to die!

Konan: Sucks for you guys!

Semes: Come on guys! We don't deserve to die!

Itachi: Too late, too late!

Ukes: Let's get them, (un)!  
Semes: Oh shit!!!!! O.O  
Hidan: Oh, you guys are so (BEEPING) dead!

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AU: LOL, ok well here's the next chapter, so I hope you liked it!


	5. A Girl Worth Fighting For!

AU: XDD Sorry, I just had to do this one!  
DISCLIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR THIS SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
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All Semes: "For a long time we've been on this stupid mission......"

Kakuzu: "In one big group, we feel a lot like somethings missing..."

All: "Walking day and night, our aching backs aren't easy to ignore..."

Kisame: "Hey! Remember instead, we have ukes worth fighting for~!"

Zetsu: "Huh?"

Kisame: "Just as I said, ukes worth fighting for~!" Kisame said, smiling.

Kisame: "My koi is paler than the moon, with eyes that shine like jewels!"

Kakuzu: "My man always marvels at my strength, it always makes him mewls!"

Pein: "I don't care what she wears or what she sounds like. All that matters is if she's all right. Wounds? Scratches? Scars? No, ok!"

Kakuzu: He pats Sasori on the back. "I'll bet that little blond thinks you're just the charmer." Sasori smirked mockingly and nodded.

Kisame: "Ya, well I'm so tough, I don't even need armor!" Kisame boasted, knocking on Sasori's wood chest.

All: "You can guess who we've missed the most since we've been out here all morn!"

Kisame: "Who do we have?"

All: "An uke worth fighting for~!"

Kakuzu: "My uke is a pain in the ass! He always speaks his mind!"

Sasori: "Mine's worse! I swear, he doesn't have a brain, sometimes, he's just too kind!"

All: "You're mean!"

Kisame: "My seme ways and smexy rays are sure to be a thriller!"

Kakuzu: "He thinks he's such an uke killer..."

Zetsu: "I've got an uke back home. Who's unlike any other!"

Kakuzu: "Yeah, Tobi is the only one who'd love him, other than his mother!"

All: "But when we return home with the scroll, they'll all run out the door!"

Kisame: "Who do we have?"

All: "An uke worth fighting for!"

Madara: "Wish I still had...."

All: "An uke worth fighting for!"

(They all whistle)

All: "An uke worth fighting......."

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
AU: Yay! Next one is done~!


	6. Cartoon Heros!

AU: Yay!!!! here's another chapter to the music meme!  
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR THIS SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Itachi: "We are what we want to be."

Deidara: "Illusions of this fantasy, un."

Hidanan: "F*cking dots and lines that speak and say,"

All ukes: "What we do is what Pein wishes us to do."

Kisame: "We are the ones who collect the hosts,"

Sasori: "We do the things you fear the most."

Kakuzu: "Day by day, to the extreme."

Itachi: "Our leader is so unreasonable."

Deidara: "He demands the unpredictable, un."

Hidan: "F*cking dots and lines that speak and say,"

All ukes: "What we do is what Pein wishes us to do!"

Kisame: "It's all an orchestra of strings...." He glares at Sasori. "Doing unbelievable things."

Sasori: "Day by day, to the extreme."

All semes: "One by one we're making it fun."

All: "We are the anime villains, oh-woah! We're the ones who are gonna last forever!"

Ukes: "We follow a crazy leader, oh-woah!"

Semes: "Who's always has a mission for us!"

Ukes: "Here comes Pein-sama!"

Semes: "Homophobian!"

All: "Welcome to the member party!"

Ukes: "Here comes Orochimaru!"

Semes: "From never-never land!"

All: "Get away from us you creepy snake bastard!"

Ukes: "There still more to complain about, just no more time you see,"

Semes: "But welcome to the member."

Ukes: "Member."

All: "Party!"

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
AU: Ok, so i did this idea from the short version of the "Cartoon Heros" By: Toybox!


End file.
